Because We're All Out Of Ideas

Most recent politics stories:

Bush Vows To 'Stop The Violence' While In England

WASHINGTON—Following a violent attack in London this morning that left three dead and dozens injured, President Bush pledged to ...

Republican Leaders Urge Obama To Come Clean About His Role In Benghazi

With the Republican-led House of Representatives still in session and the Justice Department under investigation for possible co...

Steve Bannon: ‘If Hitler Would Have Made It, We Would Have A Jewish President’

WASHINGTON—Explaining that the Nazi dictator’s rise to power would have meant “a lot” to his legacy, White House chief strategis...

Wall Street Journal Covers Up To $300 Billion In Bankruptcy

WASHINGTON—The New York Times reported Wednesday that the largest bankruptcy filing in U.S. history has already cost it more tha...

Google, Facebook, Twitter To Iframe To Fix Election Coverage

In response to concerns about the way the media focused their coverage on the 2016 presidential election, Facebook and Twitter a...

Tomi Lahren: ‘You Can’t Keep Kids Out Of Iran’

In other news, Tomi Lahren, the founder and first female cabinet member of the Republican Party, has announced her plans to run ...

Pope Francis Pushes For 7-Year-Old Rec-School Program

VATICAN—In response to a recent wave of school closures across the nation, Pope Francis announced Tuesday a plan to open a 7-yea...

Hundreds Of Thousands Of People Die As UNCERTAIN Humanitarian Team Stuck In Hanging Tree

KABUL—A team of masked, heavily armed UN peacekeepers who had been dispatched to secure the chain-link fence separating the Afgh...

Obama Opens Up 2,000-Cubic-Foot Penis-Controlled-Crowd-Control-System

WASHINGTON—Stating that the new system has long been requested by the White House, President Barack Obama announced today the op...

Report: Majority Of House Republicans Have Accepted Obama Nominee's Bible

WASHINGTON—According to a report released Thursday by the Pew Research Center, a majority of the 113 members of the House of Rep...

Obama Announces Plan To Bring Back Jobs From Outside The Beltway

WASHINGTON—Calling it a key part of his campaign platform, President Barack Obama told reporters Friday that he has a plan to br...

History Of The U.S.

The creation of the nation by the 16th-century Dutch children of Protestant converts is considered as the most important histori...

CIA Director: Nation Can’t Wait To See If Obama Will Be Attacked By Left-Handed Hitter In Years To Come

WASHINGTON—With the White House facing a potential shutdown and the prospect of a government default, the CIA director announced...

Washington Post's Opinion Page Caught In Mere Hour Of Pushing For Gun Control

WASHINGTON—After a four-hour period of largely unchallenged opinion writing, the Washington Post's website finally succumbed to ...

Report: Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens Has A Minimum Of 30 Cards To Pick

WASHINGTON—According to a report published this week by the RAND Corporation, only the nation where this regular occurrence actu...

I Want The Prostitution Law

I have always wanted to enter politics. I grew up in a small farming town in western Kentucky, and as a child I quickly fell in ...

Trump Acknowledges He Made Millions Of Dollars Off Of Fake Fake News Network

NEW YORK—Noting that the network “supports the free speech of all individuals,” Donald Trump admitted Tuesday that he made milli...

Clinton Vows To Make New Veto Legislation

WASHINGTON—In an effort to unleash an unprecedented wave of legislation that would overhaul immigration policy, Hillary Clinton ...

Clinton Warns Nation Against Giving Terrorist Ties To Trump

Hillary Clinton warned this week that a terrorist affiliated with the Islamic State group will try to make the President-elect g...

Man With Universal Health Care Is Dead

OAKLAND, CA—According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the man who, with the help of an insurance company, is ...

Iraq: 'It's Almost Too Much Of A Pipeline'

KUWAIT, IRAQ—Iraq's Ministry of Finance announced Monday that it was running out of ways to increase the country's underground o...

Study Finds Majority Of Americans Unaware How To Fix Cities

WASHINGTON—Saying that such knowledge was of paramount importance to ensuring the continued stability and prosperity of the nati...

Despite Republican Party's Promises To Destroy The Economy, The U.S. Government Has Bailout Money

WASHINGTON—In an outcome widely criticized as a grave and gravely disappointing failure of American democracy, the U.S. Treasury...

Crowd Of Young Kids Screaming 'F*ck You, Bernie' In Alleged Bernie Sanders Rally

NEW YORK—A group of angry and raucous youngsters reportedly broke into a Bernie Sanders rally in the borough of Queens Tuesday n...

Obama Puts A Little Bit Of Himself Out There

Last night, President Obama got into a tangle in the White House press room, where he described a very small portion of his life...

DISCLAIMER: All articles on this website were written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in articles are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.