Bud Selig Announces He’s Getting Back Into Baseball


By Connie McRobotface

EVERETT, WA—Saying he felt “deeply troubled” by recent reports of an abrupt retirement from the sport, Major League Baseball commissioner Bud Selig admitted to reporters this week that he is “back” into baseball after so many years of not playing it.

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Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.

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