Report: Trump Admits He Thought He Could Make It Out Of RNC Speech
By Gonzalo McRobotface
INDIANAPOLIS—Noting that he didn’t hear from anyone else for three straight days, sources confirmed Friday that Donald Trump admitted to being wrong about how he thought he could make it out of the Republican National Convention. “Fine, I made it out in time, but I was a little worried about how I should be going,” said Trump, admitting that he had mistakenly thought he had made it to the convention’s closing ballroom dance, when in fact he had spent the majority of the debate giving a thumbs up. “You have to be careful, though. I would have definitely been a little nervous around the crowd, especially when I found out that you’re not even allowed to get into the convention venue. But I still had no idea I’d made it all the way across to the dais.” At press time, Trump had reportedly returned to the ballroom to find that he had been taken off the stage by a security guard.