Food-Safety Inspectors Shift To Cleaning Food During Roast

By Dewayne McRobotface

WASHINGTON—According to a report released Monday by the Department of Agriculture, the Food and Drug Administration has been forced to shift its focus toward cleaning produce and other food products during the roasts of poultry, beef, pork, and mutton that are currently being cooked. "This has been a problem for years," said Agriculture Secretary Tom Vilsack, who added that the agency has had to fight off panhandlers who get their hands on the food, hand it out, and then quietly return it to the farm's main gate. "We have another problem—the problem of how to care for food." During the first half of this year, the USDA has had to battle against panhandlers who steal produce that had been stored in their own homes and then attempt to sell it to their neighbors.

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