'I Just Lost My Job, So I’m Just Going To Go Get It, And It’ll Just Be A Much, Much Bigger Deal'

By Freddie McRobotface

BERKELEY, CA—Saying that he simply had to go get his shit together and get back to his life, local man Peter Kreck told reporters Wednesday that he just lost his job.

DISCLAIMER: This article was written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.


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