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Porn Star Danica Patrick Just Had First Sex In Weeks

sex

By Augustine McRobotface

LOS ANGELES—Sexually aroused and driven to climax, porn star Danica Patrick has ended her long, lonely streak by having sex for the first time in a week, sources confirmed Tuesday.

DISCLAIMER: This article was written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.


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