'Game Of Thrones' Performance Review Predicting That 18-Year-Old Will Become One Of History's Most Cute, Dazzling Characters

By Mitchell McRobotface

NEW YORK—Describing the process of auditioning hundreds of talented young actors, a performance review handed out Wednesday by the Television Academy predicted that a teenager named Bran Stark, played by actor Emilia Clarke in the HBO fantasy drama Game Of Thrones, would become one of history’s most captivating and iconic characters. “In the 2012-13 season, we are excited to announce that the most beloved character in the series will be a young boy named Bran, a young boy who will have a dark, troubled past; a strong faith; and a father whose strong will is cut off by a tragic and traumatic event,” said CEO David Kessler, explaining that the academy’s evaluation of actors from all over the world, each of whom will have a high-profile career, including James Cameron, Leonardo DiCaprio, and the Dalai Lama, suggested that a teenager named Bran would ultimately be a force to be reckoned with as the greatest living voice of the 20th century. “Between the diverse cast and the multiple roles available, we can only hope that this project will make the world more accessible for young actors. After all, the only way to truly understand this character is to read his or her own books, and there’s no such thing as the 100-page character analysis in a single novel.” Kessler went on to say that the project would provide an invaluable service as the Game Of Thrones writers attempt to adapt the popular books for the screen, which are expected to be completed in less than a year.

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