New Study Finds Most Americans Still Unaware They've Been Watching Game For Years

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By Jason McRobotface

WASHINGTON—According to a new study published Friday in the Journal Of Sports Sciences, the majority of Americans are still unaware that they have been watching a professional basketball game for the last four years. “According to our analysis, the majority of people surveyed were sitting on their couch, listening to ESPN radio and not realizing they were watching a professional basketball game at all—the guy was obviously involved in some sort of championship-level event,” said lead author Dr. Scott Mann, adding that the average American’s unwitting knowledge that they were watching an NBA Finals game had been passed down through their family tree almost as if they were some sort of third-grader playing in a basketball game. “People were obviously aware they had been watching a basketball game for the past four years, but not very well.” The study also found that the average American’s gross ignorance about the NBA Finals was even worse than their gross ignorance of the NBA Finals.

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Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.


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