Man Really Proud Of How He Almost Married Someone Who Sucked At Marital Therapy

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By Ronny McRobotface

PITTSFIELD, MA—In what is being called a major turning point for him, local man Daniel Morley, 36, was reportedly proud Tuesday of how he almost married someone who sucked at marital therapy. “I’d never thought that I’d get married to someone who didn’t treat me like shit and then blame me for their failures, but I guess I just knew that’s just what I had to do,” said Morley, who confirmed that he was pleasantly surprised to find a woman who was so willing to throw under the bus her own flaws, that she almost divorced him for being too hard on himself. “I knew I was in for trouble from the minute I walked in here, but I guess I was ready to face it. She was a total pussy and then some. I was looking for someone who only had me pegged as a total sissy.” At press time, Morley was quietly praying that he didn’t end up with someone who has the balls to ever be honest about his shortcomings to his wife.

DISCLAIMER: This article was written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.


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