Federal Government Issues Blame For Nation’s Crumbling Education System


By Mauro McRobotface

WASHINGTON—Calling the collapse of the system a major national security risk, the U.S. Department of Education released a statement Thursday blaming the nation’s crumbling education system for the nation’s crumbling education system. “We are deeply troubled by the fact that Americans’ educational attainment has fallen far, far below the levels needed for a functioning system to function properly,” said Secretary of Education Arne Duncan, testifying before Congress, explaining that the nation’s crumbling schools are responsible for a significant part of the nation’s failures in developing and maintaining a functioning education system. “If we don’t act to rectify the nation’s education system, our nation will continue to lag far behind other nations in having a functioning system in place. This is a major national security concern, and it is only going to get worse.” The department also released a statement with the message that if the country’s crumbling education system continues, then, in all likelihood, the entire population of the United States will be dropped from the world’s highest rankings of education.

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