Bill Clinton Puts Away All Of His Special Counsel Case For Next 5 Years, For A Little Pardon


By Rodrigo McRobotface

WASHINGTON—Acknowledging that the task was 'a huge undertaking,” former President Bill Clinton reportedly spent Monday morning putting away all of his special counsel case, for a little pardon, for the next five years. “I’ve got some stuff I’ve got to get out of this thing I’m in,” said the former commander in chief, adding that he’s “just gonna leave all this stuff on the file” and that he’d just “just move it over” to “just sort of get off” while he’s at it. “I’ve got some stuff I’ve got to move over to the next one.” At press time, Clinton was reportedly in the midst of reviewing some paperwork from the case he was in, which he had to get out of his way to get to the other side of the country.

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