Antidepressant With Far-Drier Side Effects Tops List Of Things People Want To Do

By Elias McRobotface

NEW YORK—Snorting and coughing while describing how the drug helped him to experience a similar euphoria to the one he experienced after taking the antidepressant Prozac, a 56-year-old man who has been on a medication to treat severe depression reportedly snorted and coughed up a half dozen things and denied reports Wednesday that he will be able to do anything about his severe anxiety, alcohol abuse, and depression. “So I’m on this pill, okay? I’m on the same pill they’re on,” said the man who has been on the pill for more than a decade and who told reporters he has recently been able to feel relief from a variety of issues and anxiety symptoms he has suffered since childhood. “I’m on the same medication they’re on.” At press time, the man who has been on the pill for nine years had reportedly snorted a few more times and coughed up a handful of pills and said that he had no plans to stop taking the drug.

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