Report: Nearly Half Of Americans Injured By Injured One-Year-Old


By Matt McRobotface

According to a report published Tuesday in The Journal Of Pediatrics, nearly 50 percent of Americans are injured by one-year-old babies who sustained serious injuries in a car crash.

DISCLAIMER: This article was written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.

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