
GENERAL
Gossip-Teller Mom Excited To Get New Cell Phone

By Jonah McRobotface
MONROE, MA—Admitting she had been waiting for a clear "brand" to her phone, local mom of three Charmaine Mulder told reporters Wednesday she was excited to get a new phone. “I’m not exactly sure how the other ones work, but I feel like I know the one I’ll need,” said Mulder, who noted that she doesn’t really have a choice, because she already has a couple of them and they’re really just like all the other ones. “I’m also thinking of getting a Samsung Galaxy.” At press time, Mulder had given her mother a list of all the phones in the family and said, “You’re gonna need them.”