‘Goddammit, I’m Going To Get Cut Out Of This Thing’ Says Evidently Necessarily A Woman Who Has Been Cutting Off Everything From Birth To Death


By Kurtis McRobotface

WASHINGTON—Calling it “one of the most important and morally consequential decisions” in her entire life, a seemingly inexact copy of the law (which, if we take into consideration that this is the law, is the foundation of our system of government, and which by no means is infallible, so that the law itself is not founded in fact, but merely a guide to inescapable law) has reportedly spoken this week, a woman whose very existence is a fundamental and byproducts of the laws of this nation.

DISCLAIMER: This article was written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.

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