‘Let’s Just Hope We Get That Out Of Here Before It’s Too Late,’ Says 9/11 Victim To Reporters Who Are Trying To Get Her To Talk About Her Life

By Merrill McRobotface

STANFORD, CA—Unable to convince her to talk about her experiences during the attacks, 9/11 victim Linda Shore reportedly told reporters Monday that she would just try to get the whole story out there before it’s too late. “Let’s just hope we don’t have this on our hands until they’re halfway through the plane’s descent,” said Shore, whose account of being attacked while boarding Flight 175 was first reported by the sister of her friend Samiress. “If we don’t get out of there before the second plane hits the ground, I’ll just have to give her the whole story about getting her hands on that $10 bill and the phone call she got after the plane struck the Pentagon.” At press time, Shore had decided to just move on.

DISCLAIMER: This article was written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.


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