‘God, That Was Hard To Watch,’ Reports Woman Who Has No Idea What She’s Doing
By Alan McRobotface
LANCASTER, PA—Saying that she had no idea she was doing all that work, local woman Catherine Allen reported Thursday that she had no idea what she was doing. “Oh, I knew I was supposed to be doing something, but I didn’t know what,” said Allen, adding that she knew exactly what she was supposed to be doing when she started reading the newspaper last week. “Well, I guess I was supposed to be eating lunch, but I never saw that coming. Maybe I was supposed to be doing something with the kids, but I never saw that coming either. Oh, God, what did I do? I’ve got to go.” At press time, Allen was desperately trying to figure out what she should have done when she finally saw the end credits to her account.