Woman Who Knows How To Get Someone To Let Her Seal All Of Birth Control


By Dale McRobotface

CLARKSVILLE, OH—Saying it was the easiest thing she had ever done, area woman Julia Wight told reporters Thursday that she knows exactly how to get someone to let her seal all of her birth control. “Just tell them that I’m on my best behavior, and then I’ll be right there with them with my little girl,” said Wight, adding that she’s always been quick to help out with any of her friends who need anything from birth control. “You’re not asking for much, just be yourself and just be gentle. I’m the kind of person who always knows how to say a few words of encouragement to someone who’s been through a tough thing, and I’m the kind of person who will always be there for them.” At press time, sources confirmed that Wight was already standing in line for the next few months to get a few boxes of birth control.

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Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.

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