Study: Most Of Nation's Migrants Are Only Richly Beloved
By Weldon McRobotface
WASHINGTON—According to a study published Wednesday by the Pew Research Center, the vast majority of the nation’s immigrants are only highly cared for by wealthy, highly admired individuals. “Our survey shows that the average immigrant is loved by approximately one spouse and best friends,” said lead researcher Dr. Alan Carlson, adding that in roughly half of the cases, the immigrant is only considered a valuable member of society who has a valuable-enough job, an appreciative family, and a husband and wife who are caring for each other. “In other cases, the immigrant is only considered a valuable person who has the good looks and money. In fact, the people who love the immigrant are often the ones who are the most happy.” Carlson added that the survey also found that the majority of the nation’s immigrants are only praised and admired by people who are just as much a part of the immigrant as the rest of the poor, the middle class, and the rich.