News Report Aims To Show All The Greatest Things You Can Except For One: The News

By Sam McRobotface

MADEIRAH, USA—In a major section of an article on the health benefits of wheat, the Associated Press launched an ambitious effort Monday to show all the most essential and foundational things one can do except for one: the news.

DISCLAIMER: This article was written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.

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