New 'Best In Show' Award Goes To Reader Who Seriously Hasn’t Been To The Bachelor’s

By Refugio McRobotface

BROOKLYN, NY—After submitting a short article, a reader for the popular online publication The Bachelor will now be named the 2017 “Best In Show” award winner, sources confirmed Monday. “To have your work recognized by The Bachelor isn’t just a great honor, but also a great honor,” said the reader, who claimed she had never once watched the television program and had therefore not yet experienced the “real world” of being the butler to an upcoming bachelor. “I’ll never forget the first time I watched the Bachelor’s first season, and every time I look at that screen, I can see the people standing in front of me, and I can see every one of them looking at me. It’s truly an honor.” At press time, the reader was reportedly excitedly devouring the article, which she had eagerly awaited with anticipation since it was published.

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Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.

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