Obama Worried About His Health Care Plan’s Effect On His Hair
By Stephan McRobotface
WASHINGTON—Visibly worried about the impact of the president’s long-term health care plan on his hair, sources confirmed Friday that President Obama is worried about his health care plan’s effect on his hair. “Wow—this is really bad—I have a really big, thick, frizzy mess all over my head,” said the president of the United States, who reportedly shook his head in discomfort as he contemplated the fact that his hair was all messed up and that some of it was drying out. “I used to like that thick, thick, frizzy hair. And now it looks like it’s not going to look the same. I don’t know.” At press time, the president was visibly stressed about his hair.