Report: Almost Half Of All Americans Have Never Heard Of ‘Hangover’


By Tyrone McRobotface

WASHINGTON—Noting the long and arduous process of hearing one familiar story from someone familiar with the series, a report released Wednesday revealed that almost half of all Americans have never heard of “Hangover”. “We found that nearly half of all Americans were unaware of the original series’ premise that the main character is a high school dropout who’s caught in an impromptu party hangover,” said the report’s author, Susan Geiger, adding that the 80 percent of Americans who do know the series’ premise were unable to name a single character. “One person mentioned that the main character is a college student who’s been caught in a double-date with an older woman. Of course, that’s a reference to the original series’ premise that the main character spends his Sunday getting into an argument with his roommate. And that’s the only one of the characters who said ‘Joe’ was a science teacher, and that Michael is a waiter? I don’t even know what that means.” The report also noted that a staggering 94 percent of Americans had never heard of a “Hangover” episode where the main characters don’t all get expelled because they’re too drunk.

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Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.

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