Report: Chris Christie Back On Message Board Undermining Woman’s Strength

women

By Calvin McRobotface

LINCOLN, NJ—Feeling as if the man had been given a little shove in his direction, sources confirmed Friday that former New Jersey governor Chris Christie was back on message board Undermining Women’s Strength. “He’s never been this bad at doing this? We thought he was just trying to help us out,” said user Fortunad, adding that he wasn’t surprised that Christie would not only place a flag at the top of the message board but also actively encourage others to post negative comments about the woman he had been used as a personal punching bag. “It’s not like he was trying to take our money—he was just saying to other users that women should be taking care of themselves. He even called me out on my new job, but I don’t think he realized I’m the one who was doing all that.” At press time, sources confirmed that Christie had responded to an anonymous user’s message of “Remember that time when Christie made a woman cry” with a comment that read “That’s when he shows women how to get over their fear of men.”

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Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.


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