‘When I Think About It, I’m Already Forcing My Own Child To Die,’ Thinking Woman Hears From Underneath Car


By Frederick McRobotface

BROOKLYN—Sensing that something was seriously wrong, local woman Rebecca Galindo reportedly heard her own thoughts while driving around the Brooklyn Bridge Tuesday, her thoughts 'When I think about it, I’m already forcing my own child to die.” “When I look at the road ahead, I’m already in the exact same position,” said the woman reported to be 'drinking the last flint of her spear” before suddenly realizing what was causing her to feel “so much more alive.” “I’m so in love with this bridge. It’s the one thing I’ve seen, and it’s the one thing I’ve seen in all my life. I’m going to drown this child in its womb.” At press time, a concerned Galindo reportedly heard her own thoughts in her head, her body responded with a sharp intake of air, and she was pulled over onto the side of the bridge as the child she was already forcing to die was suddenly snatched away.

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