1-Year-Old Just Getting Hooked On Fiction About Being A Child Of God

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By Leslie McRobotface

ABERDEEN, ID—Admitting that he was surprised to find it was so relatable, local toddler William Clark told reporters Wednesday that he was just getting hooked on fiction about being a child of God. “I guess I’m used to stories about the lives of the righteous, like, what are they supposed to do?” said Clark, who has been introduced to the stories of the righteous and the innocent, of the righteous and the wicked, of the righteous and the wicked, of the righteous and the wicked, of the righteous and the wicked, of the righteous and the wicked, and of the righteous and the wicked. “I don’t mean to be a push-over. I can’t be telling you stories about how they had to die for their sins. But it seems like the ones about the good guys having to take a bullet in the face for something they did? It’s so pathetic.” Clark added that instead of just being a good boy, he should be a lot more like the virtuous chinless little boy God wants him to be and that he wants to be strong and independent.

DISCLAIMER: This article was written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.


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