Man Gives Whole Foods Grudgingly Acceptance


By Salvatore McRobotface

RALEIGH, NC—According to multiple sources, local man Fred Gilkes, a man who gets his entire paycheck from Whole Foods, gave the supermarket chain a grudging acceptance Tuesday. “I don’t know what happened, but they never quite got it right,” said Gilkes, who gives Whole Foods a 10 percent profit margin on every of his sales. “I’m usually fine with it, but sometimes I think maybe they should have given it to the farmers.” At press time, sources confirmed Gilkes had decided to give Whole Foods an entire loaf of bread instead.

DISCLAIMER: This article was written by an artificial intelligence designed to replicate satire news.
Thus, any and all statements made in this article are not meant to represent any sort of truth or reflect any personal views.

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